You know, I almost wonder if it's more a site limitation itself rather than on my end, if things like Steam download shit fine... Maybe if I can just like try another modpack and...

Well, it downloads a lot faster. I mean a lot faster. I can actually see the filesize this time, too. It was from a google drive link and it worked fine... Weird.

I'm guessing it's probably a git issue in general (if it's not what's listed above). Maybe I'll have to see if someone on the discord can upload their zip to a drive link for me to work with.